Hmm no father mentioned

[Zen Rabbit]

I received my grandfathers wedding certificate today and his father is noticeably absent. Now my grandfather was born out of wedlock but took the name of his father along with that of his mother. their wedding was in 1931 but by all accounts his father was still very much alive according to eye witnesses (my father who claims his grandfather died when he was young he was born in 32 and his cousin he can relate tales of visiting his grandfather, being the same chap, right up to the late forties). I wonder if I have stumbled upon some family grumblings. I find it odd as my grandfather's father married his mother a year after he was born and they all lived together. What do people think?

[spison]

Curious and Curiouser Zen Rabbit! I have a similar situation. My mother (who is also a researcher) and I disagree on the reasons for the omission of a name. We will never know because there's no-one left to ask. I hope you are able to solve this problem and I'll be interested in any responses you receive.
Jane

[Nannas]

Hi Zen,
My family actually does this all the time and NOW not years ago.....LOL

When my father died my sis filled in his death cert,,,,and left off one of our deceased brothers who she didn't like.....(dad died 2003) She claims she didn't know about our brother,,,or forgot about him or something,,,BUT I am the youngest and 11yrs younger than her and I know/remember....
I left my mother off all of my info (marriages etc) as I didn't like her...(she left when I was young)
My sis changed her sons name 3 or 4 times and listed diff fathers all times...(just depended on the wind with her)

People do things when they are mad or upset,,,,that sometimes they cannot change later on....(I find marriage or War Enrols usually do it...when someone needs their birth cert to marry or enrol,,,,,then find the truth about their birth cert,,,,usually causes alot of bad times)

Nannas

[Zen Rabbit]

It is curious. I never knew about my great grandfather when I was growing up. If it hadn't been for a legacy through his line that my grandfather inherited then I might never have found out. My father seemed to think that his grandad died when he was young which makes me think that he wasn't talked about much by his father and that they had little contact. Talking to my fathers cousin I get a completely different view of their common grand father with visits and such going on right up till the end of the 40's. I have sent off for a death certificate that might clear things.

[Jan65]

I can sympathise. It took me ages to find the death of my dad's grandfather. My dad, born 1938, had no memory of him, and his oldest brother, born 1925, believed that his grandad must have died before he was born as he had no memory of him either. He also said that his grandparents had split up because his grandfather was violent. They both have strong memories of their grandmother and visiting her, with no sign of their grandfather.

Based on all this, I searched and searched for my great grandfather's death, starting in the early 1920s, and didn't confine my search to my local area because of the splitting up story.

I finally found his death in 1947, when my dad was around 9 and his brother 22! Despite the splitting up story, his address was the same as his wife's, my great grandmother, and I later found out that when she died 18 years later, she was buried with him in the same grave. Whether this was her express wish, or that of the family, I don't know. But someone must have organised it. I just don't know who.

I know that neither my dad nor my uncle have deliberately mislead me, and that they told me what they believed to be true. Families are funny things, and not everyone in the family knows the whole truth of any given situation.

Good luck, I do hope you get to the bottom of your mystery!

[Zen Rabbit]

Got a death cert for my great grandfather today which confirms my dad's cousins version. He died in 1950

[spison]

Good satisfying news. Now you know and won't waste time guessing.
Jane

[blue wren]

This is a familiar story Zen Rabbit. When my mother died in 1999 my sister filled in the death certificate details. She conveniently left off the details of my mum's second marriage which ended in a messy divorce and bad feeling. My sister knew that mum just wanted to forget that part of her life as if it had never happened. It was only when I accessed the divorce file that I understood why. It is often so painful that they want to erase all memory of the event or person even after death.
Sabina