Genealogy can be boring

[pipsqueak]

Yes, it's true!

Once I found out it existed, I awaited with great anticipation the opportunity to attend my first local genealogy society meeting. I walked in, said good evening to the eight people gathered in the room and waited for the evening to begin. I was the only one who said good evening or hello or anything else.
I eventually realised that the man leaning against the table at the front of the rows of chairs had already started the meeting and was not just whiling away the time in conversation (he was trying to figure out why the door on the grandmother clock was hanging open). Then he passed around handouts. Then he read them aloud. Then he dictated the web address at the top of the paper.

After that he read an advertisement for a DNA testing company and then a man asked "where can I get some DNA?".

I wanted to die. In ninety minutes the only bright point was when he asked if anyone had anything to tell, and a woman excitedly shared something she had learnt about her family over the summer.

Unfortunately I didn't know who was new and who was "old". The chairs were in rows facing the front so it was hard to discuss anything with anyone. I had expected at least to be welcomed as a new member and asked a little about my research - but nothing. There was no clique, no cameraderie, no friends meeting friends after a long summer hiatus. Just people with notebooks writing down everything is man was saying.

I really don't want to go again - it was just soul-destroying. So much for my American genealogy.

Sad to say, this is not the first local organisation I have found so sadly lacking. Why the chairs in rows? Why no refreshments and friendly greetings? Why the lecture from the man in the front? Why do I leave thinking I want to organise my own family history society that will be FUN?

AAARRRGGGHHH!!!

[Mary Anne]

pipsqueak

Take heart, not all of them are like that! Unfortunate that it is your *local*, though!

We just finished having our annual conference and the caliber of speakers was very high, and there was a good BUZZ in the hallways throughout. For our monthly meetings, we always have coffee and cookies and a *milling-around* session before the talk, centred on *discovery tables* where some of our folks display books on Ireland, Scotland and England from their own collections.

What I am struggling with, as the newly-minted president is - how do I keep recruiting volunteers to make the coffee, greet people, and serve on the Board?! It seems it is always the same people working...

[pipsqueak]

Can I come and join yours please? How far is it to Ottawa???

[susan-y]

After that he read an advertisement for a DNA testing company and then a man asked "where can I get some DNA?".

!!!


Did you send him to the closest zoo to find his rellies----- DNA and all? |laugh1|

Sue

[Peter_uk_can]

Can I come and join yours please? How far is it to Ottawa???

I guess it all depends where one is at the time. |doh|

[BeeE586]

I am so sorry that you had such a bad experience - I do not think it is typical of Family Historians as a whole. Over the years I have belonged to nine FH Societies and still belong to three. I have been speaker at any number of Local History Society meetings and have never found any of them to be less than friendly, courteous, helpful and extremely welcoming.

Is it perhaps because I live in the north of the country ?

It is true however that many organizations of whatever nature are finding it difficult to recruit 'workers' rather than just members. I don't know the answer.

Eileen

[Geoffers]

Sad to say, this is not the first local organisation I have found so sadly lacking. Why the chairs in rows? Why no refreshments and friendly greetings? Why the lecture from the man in the front? Why do I leave thinking I want to organise my own family history society that will be FUN?

As an alternative, think of these forums as your easy access local family hostory society. It has benefits:

1) It's free

2) It's there when you want it

3) You can sit at the back of the room and slurp cups of tea or coffee and no one will complain.

4) You can dunk biscuits in your tea or coffee and no one will try to nick them off you.

[potter9597]

I can vouch for that, blast the end of my digestive's dropped off! I am a great enthusiast for this type of society. Everyone is only too willing to help and no-one takes the mick when you ask stupid questions. I've been to too many meetings in too many organisations to want to join another.

Regards

Alan

[Geoffers]

I can vouch for that, blast the end of my digestive's dropped off!

Isn't that annoying? You have to go and get a spoon and dish it out of the cuppa, and it always breaks into smaller pieces as you do so.

I can see this thread degenerating into the best way to get a broken digestive out of a cup of tea.

(Sorry pipsqueak, this is meaning of life stuff).

[Wilkes_ml]

I must admit it has been many years since I attended a local family history society meeting. having children made it impossible for me to go anymore. But I did do my fair share of putting journals in envelopes and also transcribing the gravestones in the local graveyards. But I was fortunate that I had been "induced" by a few of my work colleagues who "converted" me to family history, so there were always familiar faces at the monthly meetings.

I have been addicted (to family history!) ever since, and when I discovered this forum, I realized that it was an ideal alternative to family history society meetings - at least until the kids are older.

Don't be put off - maybe you could try to put across some new ideas and suggestions - something maybe the others would like to do but are not brave enough?

[Colin Moretti]

...Is it perhaps because I live in the north of the country ? ...I don't think so! |scold| We're just as friendly, I believe, here in Romsey (south of London, let alone Watford Gap). For example, first item on the agenda at our meetings is a cup of tea or coffee, biscuit(s) and a natter. However, I have to declare that I'm not unbiased as I help to run our local U3A genealogy group.

Perhaps not entirely with tongue in cheek, can I suggest, Pipsqueak, that you stay with the group and when the time comes volunteer to help organise it; as Eileen also said:
It is true however that many organizations of whatever nature are finding it difficult to recruit 'workers' rather than just members. Perhaps yours just needs a blood transfusion. Expertise not needed, just enthusiasm.

Colin

[pipsqueak]

Droopy Digestives notwithstanding.... (and now you've mentioned them I want one )..... I believe there is a lot to be said for people who are willing to put their money where their mouth is. I am usually willing to help out and offer new suggestions - I'd even lead meetings if that's what was wanted - but I can hardly walk into a new group and offer to do that on the first night. I wasn't even sure if they had a committee or whether it was just this one-man show. One has to be careful about treading on tootsies.....

What are the best FamHistSoc meeting ideas that could be useful over here?

[v.wells]

Perhaps I have become a tad anti social in my older years but as I see it the only patient people in this world are dead! So in order to create change you have to speak up to make it happen and too bad about other people's tootsies! Of course be nice but hell, life is too short to waste on the pedantic prattle of time wasters!

I would hold up my hand bravely at the beginning of the meeting, tell them my name and say "I am new to this group, love family research and I am here to learn and help! Is there anyone else here that fits the bill?"

And take a package of digestives!:D

[Geoffers]

Droopy Digestives notwithstanding.... (and now you've mentioned them I want one )...

..............wipes crumbs away from mouth...............


What are the best FamHistSoc meeting ideas that could be useful over here?

How about a problem solving evening in which everyone comes along with a problem where they are stuck and everyone tries to help - perhaps take a laptop along to the meeting and log onto B-G forums - if we had prior warning a few of us might be abe to be about to help throw in some answers?

Single topic meetings on how to use specific resources - e.g. USGenWeb, probate, passenger lists, etc.

[Peter_uk_can]

So....... I found myself wondering if any figures had been published that would at least provide an estimate as to the total number of potential digestive munching genealogists there were.

I came across this site which throws out some figures.

http://blog.eogn.com/eastmans_online_genealogy/2006/01/how_popular_is_.html

Doubtless there are more sites with differing estimates, but the "Google" count for key words sent me on my own quest.

Now, if I was to invest some money in the "digestive biscuit/cookie" market and then persuade every genealogically interested soul to purchase 1 pkt...

and to think, maybe if "pipsqueak" had received a warm welcome at the meeting, this thread may never have happened.

[Astoria]

Something tells me you are a leader rather than a follower - can't think where I get that impression from.

You obviously have a lot of personal knowledge and expertise, you know your way around the internet, you know where and how to ask for help. I imagine you are no stranger to the odd dusty book, faded film or water-damaged census.

Start your own group/society and share, obviously the odd Hob Nob won't go to waste.

Why not start with a chat night at the local library.

[pipsqueak]

Geoffers - good idea - that would be fun!
Peter - I had no idea I'd started a biccy chat. I think that it was HobNobs and Digestives that were fundamentally lacking last night!


Something tells me you are a leader rather than a follower - can't think where I get that impression from.

Not always... but I learned a long time ago that if I want to join doesn't exist, then I must start the group myself.


You obviously have a lot of personal knowledge and expertise, you know your way around the internet, you know where and how to ask for help. I imagine you are no stranger to the odd dusty book, faded film or water-damaged census.

You credit me with way too much knowledge here. I have no expertise at all, but I can find my way around the web well enough. I have rarely handled a dusty tome and when I did I didn't want to give it back ;) I've yet to see faded film or a water-damaged census in real life.


Start your own group/society and share, obviously the odd Hob Nob won't go to waste.

Ah Hob Nobs... Can I justify paying the exorbitant price they cost in the Irish foods section of the grocery store? |biggrin|


Why not start with a chat night at the local library.
That would be good... except then I'd be on the same turf as the aforementioned meeting. |oopsredfa I think I'll be safer at the local coffee shop, with muffins and free wireless!

[Astoria]

Chin up, if you need Hob Nobs PM me. Bet I can send them cheaper than a specialist store.

[pipsqueak]

You are a sweetie Astoria. |hug|
My sis is coming over for Thanksgiving though, and she'll be able to bring me whatever goodies my little heart desires :)

[Fidgetsmum]

Hi pipsqueak, I've only just found your original post and have to say it completely mirrors my own experience.

Work and caring for my own brood plus a band of elderly rellies means I don't get many evenings 'free' so I was really looking forward to my first (and I have to say - only) visit.

Like you, there about 10 of them. When I first arrived I was met by a sour-faced woman who, when I explained that I wasn't a member didn't even say 'welcome', but merely pushed a form towards me with the words 'It's [whatever it was] to join' and like a twit, I handed over said amount. That was the high point! Not one person had the courtesy to say good evening, those whom I assumed to be the 'regulars' pointedly stared at me and then went into various huddles leaving me to find a seat somewhere in the middle which I occupied in glorious isolation while they and their thick folders, occupied the front two rows.

The formal 'meeting' part of the evening was, mercifully, short - someone had brought with them some recently acquired postcards, but no-one thought I too might be interested. There was a brief mention of the fact that Fred or Joe or whatever his name was had identified 'the map' and the remainder left me wondering whether I hadn't stumbled onto the set of a shopping channel, given over as it was to trying to sell members everything from CDs and books to archive storage material and enthusing over the 'faux leather' covers (which apparently looked identical to the real thing - and might as well have been considering the price they were charging).

'I take it there are no questions?' and all 10 heads shook vigorously, so needless to say I kept quiet. Tea and biccies followed, I skulked cradling a cup and saucer, smiled at one guy who actually came up and said 'why are you here?' - in a tone which suggested I really shouldn't be - and to my reply (that I was hoping to learn how to go about taking my research further etc.,) his, before he re-joined his mates, was a rather disappointed 'Oh'.

I stuck it out for a further 10 minutes or so but it was when I over-heard, as indeed I was meant to, a distinctly pointed '.. can't stand people who only join to get free information ..' I decided I'd had enough.

I've been told by many people both here and elsewhere that they're not all like that, but I've no wish to find out. As for the subscription? They can keep it, it's a small price to pay for not having to go again.

[Lesley Robertson]

pipsqueak

Take heart, not all of them are like that! Unfortunate that it is your *local*, though!

We just finished having our annual conference and the caliber of speakers was very high, and there was a good BUZZ in the hallways throughout. For our monthly meetings, we always have coffee and cookies and a *milling-around* session before the talk, centred on *discovery tables* where some of our folks display books on Ireland, Scotland and England from their own collections.

What I am struggling with, as the newly-minted president is - how do I keep recruiting volunteers to make the coffee, greet people, and serve on the Board?! It seems it is always the same people working...


How true. I Chair an amateur theatre group - same problem.
Have you noticed that Bo Peep's started password-protected forums for FHSs? They're down at the bottome of the front page, and there should be an announcement about it somewhere, but I can't find it right now. Maybe if your members got exposed to the atmosphere of BG, they'd be more enthusiastic about coming forward?
Otherwise, I use the military volunteer approach these days - "you, you and you"....
Lesley

[Fidgetsmum]

I suppose I could have written a letter of complaint, but I think that might have looked slightly 'your members didn't want to play with me' and thus a bit petty. I wasn't particularly upset by their attitude, more angry and saddened that they (or at least those present if it wasn't representative)so clearly weren't prepared to share their enjoyment and enthusiasm.

[susan-y]

Oh, Fidgetsmum...so sorry you had such an unlucky experience:(
Can you imagine if in some way this group on here could all meet? No one would be able to get a word in edgewise|laugh1||laugh1| and someone would pour that cup of tea for you:D

Sue

[arthurk]

Another possibility might be to write to the Federation of Family History Societies (FFHS). This kind of thing might concern them enough for them to issue reminders and guidance to member societies on welcoming newcomers.

Arthur

[Fidgetsmum]

Can you imagine if in some way this group on here could all meet? No one would be able to get a word in edgewise
Sue

Some years back I found out that one of the villages some of my ancestors hailed from, was holding a History Weekend - anyone and everyone with any connection to the village was invited to attend. It was supposed to be held over the Saturday and Sunday but, being a couple of hundred miles from home (for me at least) I booked into a hotel and arrived late on the Friday morning. Before I'd even made it into the hotel, I began talking to the couple unloading their car next to me (who'd come for the same reason), and I didn't stop talking until I finally left about 11 p.m. on the Sunday!

[Lesley Robertson]

I suppose I could have written a letter of complaint, but I think that might have looked slightly 'your members didn't want to play with me' and thus a bit petty. I wasn't particularly upset by their attitude, more angry and saddened that they (or at least those present if it wasn't representative)so clearly weren't prepared to share their enjoyment and enthusiasm.


Check with your local library, there might be a Local History group in the area. They can't all be nutters!

Otherwise, I guess you're stuck with us..... |book2|
|laugh1|
Lesley

[Summer]

I began talking to the couple unloading their car next to me (who'd come for the same reason), and I didn't stop talking until I finally left about 11 p.m. on the Sunday!

I tend to get like this with my family ("Guess who's your greatX4 grandfather and where he came from" etc). Although the eyes of the members of my family tend to glaze over when I start talking! Tough crowd! and very frustrating when you're bursting to tell about your new find.

So, yes, genealogy can be boring.....
to some, but not to me!

[THE BARON]

Having read all your comments on this thread .
I would just like to add, genealogy on the web has given me more help/information, PLUS many more like pal's than any club could .
Also It has made PERIOD DRAMA on TV more interesting as I can now see the conditions that my Family & the folks of that time had to put up with.
I WISH TO THANK ALL MEMBERS OF THIS FORUM FOR THE HELP & GOOD WILL SHOWN TO ME FROM THE DAY I JOINED.
THE BARON

[suedent]

Some years back I found out that one of the villages some of my ancestors hailed from, was holding a History Weekend - anyone and everyone with any connection to the village was invited to attend. It was supposed to be held over the Saturday and Sunday but, being a couple of hundred miles from home (for me at least) I booked into a hotel and arrived late on the Friday morning. Before I'd even made it into the hotel, I began talking to the couple unloading their car next to me (who'd come for the same reason), and I didn't stop talking until I finally left about 11 p.m. on the Sunday!

That sounds like our Polperro FHS weekends. We often have people popping into the old chapel while we set up on Fridays & they are more than welcome.

Officially the Saturday is for members only, it's when we hold our AGM. But if others pop in we certainly don't turn them away (apart from those expecting the usual art exhibition). In fact we have managed to recruit some new members from those just popping in. One gentleman who just popped in dashed home & collected a carrier bag full of deeds & loaned them to the society to be transcribed.

Several times I've been sitting in the pub during the weekend & people have been directed to me as the "family history person" & I wouldn't dream of being standoffish with them. Apart from anything else, given the nature of Polperro genealogy, there's a good chance that we might be related :D