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michaelpipe
09-06-2008, 8:47 AM
NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS TO CONFUSE DESCENDANTS UNDERTAKING GENEALOGICAL RESEARCH.

It is New Year's Eve 1852 and Henry HYDENWELL sits at his desk by candlelight. He dips his quill pen in ink and begins to writes his New Year's resolutions.

1. No man is truly well-educated unless he learns to spell his family name at least three different ways within the same document.

2. I resolve to see to it that all of my children will have the same proper names that my ancestors have used for at least six generations in a row.

3. My age is no one's business but my own. I hereby resolve to never list the same age or birth year twice on any document.

4. I resolve to have each of my children baptized in a different church -- either in a different faith or in a different parish. Every third child will be baptized at an age of at least two, maybe more, and maybe twice at different parishes.

5. I resolve to move to a new village at least once every 10 years -- just before those pesky enumerators come around asking silly questions.

6. I will make every attempt to reside in counties and villages where no vital records are maintained or where the church (and its records) burns down every few years.

7. I resolve to join an obscure religious cult that does not believe in record keeping or in participating in military service.

8. When the tax collector comes to my door, I'll loan him my pen, which has been dipped in rapidly fading blue ink.

9. I resolve that if my beloved wife Mary should die, I will marry another Mary and again make no mention of her family name.

10. I resolve not to make a will. Who needs to spend money on a lawyer?

11. I resolve to leave lots of family photographs, but never to inscribe the names or relationships of those in the pictures.

12. In the above manner, I will enshrine myself and my progeny to the whims of all those descendants who wish me to be more like they believe they are.
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Jan1954
09-06-2008, 9:12 AM
Oh Michael!

I can so relate to this - it could have been written by one of mine :D

Just add in the following:

13. I resolve to not only change the spelling of my surname when talking to those pesky enumerators, but to change it to something totally different from time to time.

14. All of my children will be known by their familiar pet name on several official documents instead of that by which they were baptised.

AnnB
09-06-2008, 2:16 PM
10.(a) I resolve that if I do make a will, I shall be careful not to actually name any of my children......

Best wishes
Ann

Davran
09-06-2008, 5:50 PM
15. I will either not marry the mother of my children (though she will use my surname) or will ensure that the record of the marriage can never be found.

16. I will change my occupation at least every 10 years.

17. My children shall be called by their first name some of the time and by their middle name at other times. The middle names of some of them shall be the same as the first name of others.

v.wells
09-06-2008, 6:05 PM
|laugh1||laugh1||laugh1||laugh1|
Now That has made my day! Exquisitely funny!

busyglen
09-06-2008, 6:29 PM
Oh my! So that's the reason I can't find my rellies! |sad1|

Glenys

pipsqueak
09-06-2008, 7:05 PM
|laugh1| That is very funny - one to be printed out and stuck on the fridge!

I have a few to add of my own...

I, Pipsqueak, do hereby make the following resolutions to baffle genealogists of the 22nd century:

1. I resolve to be born to parents who (despite their ancestors not having moved much in five hundred years) lived 200 miles apart and met while holidaying in Switzerland.

2. I resolve to be born in a place 70 miles from where I will spend my childhood and to which I will never return.

3. I resolve that my father shall die in a city street 40 miles from home and have his death registered in that city, but his burial shall occur in the town that is the home to which he moved following the last census. This shall occur in the same month and year as the next census.

4. I resolve that on reaching adulthood I shall move about the world in a random fashion, resulting in my being omitted from one census of England and one census of the United States, but being included in various statistics elsewhere.

5. I resolve that like my mother before me, I shall meet my husband by non-traditional means which shall result in a wedding in England followed by a married life in America. Further, I shall change my name and my religion.

6. I resolve that I will leave all my genealogical records on "compact disks", "memory sticks" and on "websites", all of which will be defunct in the 22nd century. Furthermore, I shall preserve all photographs and papers dated prior to 1970, which shall be carefully labelled and stored in acid-free boxes. All photographs after that date will either be strangely green or yellow or they will be digital and on a memory stick which someone will have lost. There will be no papers after 2001 by which time everyone will think I am dead because I missed that census too.

busyglen
09-06-2008, 7:30 PM
I really like that Pipsqueak! |biggrin||biggrin|

Glenys

clivemed
09-06-2008, 11:04 PM
Oustanding! I can only think of one other:-
Just when you think you have covered all the possible combinations of age, name spelling, place of residence to no avail. The magic blue ink then becomes less faded and there I am in the first place you looked!|banghead|

Astoria
09-06-2008, 11:22 PM
I resolve that all my children will have the same names as their uncles, aunts, cousins, sisters and brothers be they alive or dead, male or female.

Giuseppe, Giuseppa, Gionvanni, Giovanne, Giovanna and so on, don't start me on Andrea !!!

All married to; see the above list - keys in a fruit bowl do you think?

But it keeps me hunting, :D

Mutley
09-06-2008, 11:44 PM
I (or rather, my mum originally) resolve that the first name on my birth certificate should never be used again, ever.

I was born and ceased to exist - immortality:D

BeeE586
16-06-2008, 1:04 AM
I resolve that if I and any of my brothers have issue of the same sex born in the same year, then they shall be given the same name, but the name of the mother shall not be mentioned.

If I make a will, I shall refer to 'my loving wife' but never mention her name and any other family members shall be referred to as 'my kinsfolk'.

Eileen

jeanettemarie
16-06-2008, 9:27 AM
I can relate to all of the above, that is exactly what my paternal side have done|banghead| I am completelt miffed, but I have their resolve, I will dig them up eventually,:eek: figuretively speaking, of course:)
Jeanette